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Playing music: Down with the Sickness // Disturbed
Hallo die Schikeria.
As pun intended in the title and playing music, I am currently in rest after a week battling with inconsistent fever, coughing non-stop, sometimes getting a headache, and having difficulty talking because of a putrid sore throat. Basically, I'm in bad shape. At first, I just dealt with these symptoms by taking Panadol and Strepsils every day and I went on with my life as usual. Reaching day 5 of consuming Panadol and Strepsils, my symptoms just went much worst than it already is. I've decided that I need to see the doctor. Using all my remaining strength left, I went to the clinic on my own. The clinic is just 10 minutes walk away from where I'm staying. As I was on the way to meeting the doctor, I updated my condition on my Instagram. Where else would you update about your life and get the attention you need if it wasn't on the 'Gram, am I right? 😆
Anyway, the nurse took my temperature and blood pressure, then I waited to be called to meet the doctor in the waiting hall. Then, my name was called. I finally met the doctor. I told the doctor what was up with me. Then, the doctor set me up in the medical lab to run some tests. I took the saliva COVID test first. Thankfully, I'm negative. Then, proceed with a blood test. Waited for a while. Got the result. Went back to see the doctor. She said that I may have a few bacteria inside my blood. I have no idea what that means, but I was like okay. She prescribed me paracetamol, allergic meds, coughing syrup, and antibiotics. After I took my medicine, a friend of mine asked me to go to lunch together and we were off.
That's some backstory of what's happening to me for these past few days.
What's the point of this post, exactly?
I. Need. The. Attention, thank you very much.
Jokes aside, I'll throw some thoughts here. Last weekend, as I was dealing with the symptoms, I felt super lonely. My thoughts went from thinking about my weekend room cleaning chores to
"I'm going to die alone, no?"
Just straight down to a dark rabbit hole. I felt super devastated by the thoughts that came to my mind and loneliness starts to creep in. Before this went worst, I called some of my friends. None of them picked up the call. I felt more devastated. Then, a name pops up in my head. I immediately called her. She picked up. So we talked for hours. After done talking with her, I felt a bit better. At late night, loneliness slowly creeps in again. This time, I texted my best friend. She replied a bit later. As I was waiting for her reply, I ended up falling asleep. I woke up the next morning feeling a bit better than before.
When I decided to post some updates on Instagram, it was like a cry for help. I guess sometimes, being sick makes you feel vulnerable and lonely. I'm not usually acting like that. But you know, when you have to take of yourself because no one is around to keep you company, that really hits something.
"I've been strong all these times, and I'm tired. Can't just for once I have that one person that I can rely upon and let me rest instead?"
Unfortunately, I don't have that one person. But, I do have people that really care about my well-being. My labmates helped me with my lab work for this week since I have to submit a progress report by end of the week. Some of my friends occasionally keep updated with my condition from time to time and remind me to take my medicine. My part-time colleagues always remind me to eat and if I got nothing to eat, they'll buy or cook me something for me to eat. Some of them asked about my well-being, and help me during my shift when I'm working alone. I feel super grateful for everything that these people have given me. It touches deep in my meow meow 🥹
All I want to say is that sometimes being sick makes you realize the things you would probably take for granted when you're healthy. Be grateful while you still have it before it went away. BRB, gonna cry in my sleep and do pray that I'll be healthy so that I can continue with my days as usual.
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